Legendary Ninja Shin-chan 1: Shake in laughter before him
by Lord Keiichi of Umineko
Summary: Shin-chan went to academy with Naruto. Watch his way of becoming a ninja truly no one will ever forget. How will the ninja world survive in Shin-chan's weirdness? Starts at chapter 1 of the manga. Rated M because this will be Shin-chan uncensored. Prequel and more crossovers later.
1. You are the Nine-tails? But you

As much as I would like to simply start with the story, I need to explain the setting first since I don't want to begin when Shin moves to Konoha. That's 'Legendary Ninja Shin-chan 0'.

I use the FUNimation cast because I'm more familiar with them. Only Shin-chan, Masao, Bo (12) and Himawari (8) go to academy. Honestly, I just don't want to create too many new teams. Bo is quiet but not retarded here, Masao still easily scared and you will read about Shin often enough.

After becoming close friends with Shin-chan, Naruto lives with the Noharas. He got secretly adopted by them but he still goes by his original name.

Shin-chan is as infamous as Naruto in the local neighborhood but both have friends and are generally happy. I won't say anything about the relationships with the other classmates, only that some big incidents happened.

Also, in Shin's favorite TV show Action Bastard is a really strong ninja.

* * *

Legendary Ninja Shin-chan 1: Shake in laughter before him

Chapter 1: You are the Nine-tails?! But you …

* * *

Naruto sat on a swing depressed by his failure. He watched all the happy graduates who were praised by their smiling parents. If he had, the Noharas would have done that with me, too. He sighed deeply. As he looked around, he spotted Misae, Hiro and Hima but Shinnosuke wasn't with them.

"Shin-chan! Where are you?" They shouted several times. However, Shinnosuke didn't come. _"__I wonder where he is. I doubt he has already gone home.__"_

"Maybe I should search, too." A quiet voice said in the back of Naruto's head.

Naruto sighed and muttered to himself. "Yeah. It's better than moping around." He continued a bit louder. "Shin."

"HERE!"

Naruto jumped up, surprised by the sudden shout from behind. He tried to turn at the same time but with the swing between his legs, Naruto lost his balance and fell on his back. He looked up at Shinnosuke who laughed at him.

"Shin, why aren't you over there?!"

"It looked like you were having fun." He told Naruto with a straight face.

"How can you get the idea that I was having fun?! I failed! I want to be alone!"

"Oh." For a few seconds, there was silence. "How about now? Wanna play ninja?"

"NO! Aaargh, .." Naruto stood up and ran past him.

"We can play hide and seek, too."

Misae, Hiro and Hima came over to Shinnosuke.

"Was that Naruto?" Misae asked.

"Yeah, Mitzi. We are playing hide and seek. By the way, I think he has his special days."

"Only women get these days, Shin-chan. What happened to Naruto?"

Shinnosuke shrugged. "Not much. He only failed again."

"Poor Naruto-niichan."

* * *

Shinnosuke was still searching for Naruto, even though his family told him that Naruto should be left alone for a while. Oh, and that Naruto WASN'T playing hide and seek with him. But that was stupid. Playing hide and seek was far more fun than feeling sorry for yourself after all.

Suddenly, Shinnosuke heard Naruto's shout. "Hey, Shin." He was obviously far happier than before.

"Found you! Now, you have to find me!"

"Huh? It doesn't matter." Naruto simply continued happily. "Mizuki-sensei gave me another chance. The only thing I need to do is to steal some scroll and learn one technique from it."

"So you don't want to play anymore? Then you have to say the magical words!" Shinnosuke got closer and whispered into Naruto's ears. "It's 'Please release me, master.'"

"What?! I will never say something like that! And stop reading those orange books of dad!"

"Ah, well." Shinnosuke shrugged. "Can I join you?"

"No. He said that I have to do this on my own."

"What if I only followed you and you did everything on your own?"

Naruto pondered a bit. "Okay, but be quiet."

"I'll be as quiet as a mouth."

"You mean a mouse."

* * *

After having knocked out the Hokage with his Sexy no Jutsu, Naruto was searching for the forbidden scroll Mizuki mentioned.

Meanwhile, Shinnosuke was searching for interesting stuff at Hiruzen Sarutobi's home. He moved to Hiruzen's study. He sat down on the revolving chair behind the desk. "Comfy." He spun around a few times, yelling 'Woohoo'. However, soon he beacme dizzy. In this state, he got up and tried to walk away. When he lost his balance, Shin tried to grab the edge of the desk. Instead though his hand reached to the big stack of paper.

Shinnosuke gulped at the mess he made.

"Shin! I've found the scroll. Let's go!"

"Uh, one moment!" _"__I have to think fast. Ah, that's it.__"_ Shinnosuke giggled to himself. He wrote a small note and left.

"Nothing happened, ha ha ha!"

"Okaaay. Then why are you telling me?"

"Just because."

* * *

A few hours later in the woods …

Shinnosuke was leaning against a tree, still exhausted from one attempt at the Shadow Clone technique. In contrast, to that Naruto was still going on without a break.

That's when they heard a scream from the distance.

"Was that the old man?" Naruto asked.

"He sounds like he woke up from a nightmare." Shinnosuke added.

"SASUKE UCHIHA!"

While Naruto was confused, Shinnosuke began giggling.

"You should hurry up, Naruto. The old man will come looking for you."

"You are right."

* * *

Shinnosuke stood up and walked to the tree a few meters in front of Naruto. He dropped his pants and underwear and began to pee. Naruto looked to the side with a twitching eye but he continued to practice the Shadow Clone technique without complaining. The next thing, however, he couldn't let pass.

"Go somewhere else!"

"Why?" Shinnosuke was sqatting on the ground with his butt out.

"I don't want to see you doing it!"

"But -"

"NO! I don't want to see, hear, smell or anything else about your poo!"

Shinnosuke stood up and pulled up his pants and underwear. He turned his back towards Naruto. "Are you happy now, Naruto?"

Naruto rolled his eyes at his dramatic act. "It's more relief than happiness."

"Don't come looking for me." After these words, Shinnosuke ran off.

Naruto shook his head, but a few laughters still escaped his mouth. Finally, he resumed his training. _"__Just this one jutsu. Then I'm going to be a ninja.__"_

* * *

After taking a dump, Shinnosuke looked around him. "Nothing but trees here. How do I get back to Naruto?"

* * *

Thirty minutes later, Shinnosuke had still not returned. Naruto began to feel worried about him. He managed to complete the Shadow Clone Jutsu in the time Shin was away and now he wanted to surprise him with it. While he was leaning against a tree, someone appeared in front of him all of a sudden.

*****The following parts is only a slightly shortened version of the same part in the manga******

"I found you!"

"Are you going to test me instead of Mizuki-sensei, Iruka-sensei?"

_"What kind of -"_

Iruka had no time to complete his question as he had to intercept the kunais that flew towards Naruto. Pierced by several kunais, he looked up at Mizuki who was standing on a tree.

"Naruto, give me the scroll!"

Confused, Naruto switched between looking at the calm Mizuki and Iruka who who was bleeding. "Hey, what's going on?! Hey!"

"Naruto! Don't give him that scroll even if you die! That is a dangerous scroll that has forbidden ninjutsu sealed within it! Mizuki used you in order to get his hands on it!"

When Naruto tensed, Mizuki stared at him intently. "Naruto … there is no point in you having it. I'll tell you the truth."

"NO! DON'T!"

"12 years ago … you know about the demon fox being sealed right? After the attack, a new rule was created in the village. However, it was never meant to be told to you."

Naruto listened to each word with wide eyes.

***** new part here *****

Mizuki started to laugh to himself. He was going to enjoy the last moments of the demon and decided to draw this a bit out. "Can you guess what it is?"

"What … kind of rule is it?"

Mizuki could barely keep his laugher. "The rule is …"

"Oh, oh, I know the answer! I'll be the new candidate, Shinnosuke Nohara!" Suddenly, Shinnosuke appeared between Iruka and Naruto. The light dimmed except around Shinnosuke and Mizuki.

"Let's hear your answer then, Nohara-san!"

"It's something that Naruto mustn't be told about … and there is only one answer to that. If anyone told Naruto about the huge ramen sale in the Shirakawa mall on the third friday every month, he would only eat ramen since you get 100 packs for only 50 Ryo!."

"Wow, how cheap!"

Meanwhile, Iruka slapped his forehead.

"Unfortunately, that's the wrong answer. The rule is that nobody is allowed to talk about the fact that Naruto is the demon fox that -"

Shin cut him off. "Okay, next question."

"Right. What are the three magical numbers of Tsunade of the Sannin?"

"Hmm. Her bust is definitely over 100 -"

"WAIT! This isn't a quiz show! I'm about to kill Naruto!"

"Then, you really suck at this. You shouldn't play quiz show host in the middle of killing someone." Shinnosuke stated.

"That's your fault!" Mizuki yelled back. "Ugh, where was I?" He thought aloud.

"Oi, what happened to the evil fox demon?"

While Naruto's shock turned into depression, Mizuki resisted the urge to shout at Shinnosuke again in order to finish the answer he interrupted before properly.

"Naruto is the demon fox that killed Iruka's parents and destroyed the village. It means …"

"Stop it !" Iruka shouted.

"you were sealed up by the Hokage you admire …"

"Stop it !"

"You have been lied to by everyone! - Didn't you find it odd how everyone hated you? Iruka is the same! He actually hates you!" Mizuki aimed his large shuriken at the shocked and depressed Naruto. "Nobody will ever accept you! That scroll was used to seal you up!" He threw ...

"What !? -"

… and missed completely. "Dammit! Stop interrupting me already!"

Shinnosuke turned towards Naruto. "You are the Nine-tails!? But you …"

_"You are realizing it just now !?"_ Was the thought, the two chunin shared.

Naruto looked at Shin with empty eyes. _"__Now, he will hate me too.__"_

"… have only one tail and it's shorter than mine."

Naruto's eyebrows twitched. "It's no wonder if you pull on yours all the time."

Shin started to act shyly. "So … you are looking at me … I thought you loved Hinata. I -"

Naruto sputtered. "It's nothing like that! I swear!" He waved his hands in front of him. "I'm straight! And Hinata-chan is only a friend! Nothing else!"

"I love you, too, Naruto-niichan." Shinnosuke turned towards Mizuki again and glared at him. "No one's going to hurt my brother and get away with it! Except for mom when he is an idiot! But she usually punishes me for some reason!" Shinnosuke glanced over his shoulder at Naruto who joined him at his left side. "Let's kick his ass like Action Bastard!"

"Yeah! Let's kick his ass!" Naruto raised a fist in the air.

Mizuki wasn't sure what happened in the last few minutes but there was no turning back. It was three against one now.

"Good luck, Naruto. You are on your own." Shinnosuke took a few steps back.

… or maybe not.

"Come back! I thought we would beat him together!"

"This is your test, remember? I mustn't interview."

"Interfere. And he lied. So it's okay if we work together."

"You know … if you can beat a chunin on your own in a real fight, you must be good enough for genin."

"Shin .." Naruto drawled.

Iruka had watched everything from the sideline. Honestly, he was prepared to protect Naruto with his life but somehow Shin's … Shinness, that was the only word he could think of to describe him, stopped Mizuki's attack. However, Shinnosuke wasn't simply a goofy child with the sex-drive of a hormon-crazed teenie if you looked past ... well ... actually … nearly everything. Yeah, he truly cared for Naruto but this -

"You can beat him, Naruto. When you do, you get Iruka's headband and he is going to treat us to ramen."

"Hey! I haven't agreed to this!"

Naruto looked at Shinnosuke again and nodded.

"Pff. Like one academy student can beat me, no less you." Mizuki sneered at Naruto. "I'm going to kill you!"

"Booo!"

"Maybe not one, but maybe a thousand. Shadow Clone technique!"

Suddenly, Mizuki was surrounded by thousand Narutos. They rushed at the panicked Mizuki and beat him up.

"VICTORY DANCE!" Shin shouted. "GANGNAM STYLE!"

Naruto and his clones shrugged and started to dance along with Shin.

Iruka sweatdropped. _"__How could this ever become popular?__"_

* * *

Later at the Hokage Tower …

Shinnosuke, Naruto and Iruka returned the forbidden scroll to the Hokage. He them that they acted correctly and gave them the payment of a B-ranked mission though Iruka gave his part to the other two.

Shinnosuke held his hand out to Naruto. "You, too."

"What?! I beat him while you watched me!"

Shinnosuke pouted. "You are really greedy, Naruto."

"That's what I should say about you."

The Hokage coughed to get their attention.

"Need a cough drop, old man." Shin asked.

"No. I have some good news and some bad news to tell you." The Hokage looked at Naruto. "First, congratulation Naruto, you pass and become a genin of Konohagakure."

"Really?" Naruto asked with tears forming in his eyes.

The Hokage nodded with a smile. "How could I not let the future Hokage pass."

Naruto glomped him while saying 'Thank you' over and over.

Iruka smiled and clapped.

Shin began to whistle. "And now kiss."

Immediately, Naruto separated from the Hokage with a red face.

Iruka punched Shin on the head. "It was nothing like that."

"But that's what happened in the last episode of 'The scret love of Matsumoto' when he came back from a mission and cheated on his wife with his sensei."

"It was his older teammate. How can you even watch this?"

"Dad taught me how to crack the codes of the child safety device when I was five. How do even know so much about this soap opera?"

Iruka swallowed. "Ehh …"

The Hokage cleared his throat.

"Are you sure you don't need a cough drop?"

The old man sighed. _"__I'm getting too old for this.__"_ "I don't. Shin-chan, you will clean the mess you made in my study. I want you to sort all requests, formulas, draft bills and other things by type and urgency."

"But it was Sasuke. I've even left the note that said so after I knocked the stack over."

While Naruto slapped his forehead and Iruka facepalmed, the Hokage gave him a flat look.

"But the stack was huuuge." Shin whined.

"That's your problem."

"Okay, I'll deal with it like a man." He puffed his chest and sent the Hokage a defient look. "Naruto?"

"Oh no, you do it on your own." Naruto croseed his arms. No success with Iruka either.

That was when a man with a large stack of paper entered the room.

"Hey, you, are you good with paperwork?"

The man blinked at this question. "I'm the Hokage's personal assistant."

"How about some extra cash for doing my paperwork?" He waved his bundle of bills in front of him.

"Okay, I will .." Then, he noticed the Hokage''s look. "Erm, I mean, I have many other things to do like …"

The Hokage interrupted him. "I'm sure you were very eager to help Shin-chan with his punishment." _"__Huh?__"_ "So you can watch over him, make sure he does everything correctly and answer his questions."

The assistant sent him a pleading look but bowed his head in the end. "Yes, Hokage-sama."

"I potty you."

"It's pity and it's still your punishment."

"That's what you think."

* * *

released: 02-20-13  
minor corrections: 03-13-13  
Omake 1 included: 02-20-13

* * *

Yay, on my birthday. It's already the third longest of all Shin-chan fics (22 with crossover including this one).

I've decided to write this instead of finishing the second chapter of my main story 'The Fox That Wanted To Be A Dragon'. After I write the last part, it should ready to be released

* * *

Omake: Alternate chapter 1

Mizuki stood on a protrusion of a house near the Hokage Tower as he watched Naruto run away with the forbidden scroll. He smirked. His plan went nicely, actually Naruto got the scroll much faster than he expected him to. But that wasn't a bad thing. "It just means that I can move on with my plan much sooner. Heh heh heh, he has no idea that he has shortened because I will get rid of him. Nothing will get in my way now. Bwahahahaha..."

"Hahahahaha..."

Then, Mizuki noticed the second laughter next to him. He stopped laughing and looked at the person who laughed along with him.

"So what's so funny?" Asked Shinnosuke.

"Oh I just thought of a funny joke, hahaha." Mizuki laughed. _"__Damn you kid!__"_

"Wow, tell me!"

"I can't tell you!"

"Of course you can, this is already rated M. Oh, that was arandom rap!"

"That's nice." _"__Now leave me alone. I need to spread the word that Naruto stole the scroll so that I can make it look like he disappeared with it.__"_

"Say why are you even here, Mizuki?"

"That's what I want to know, too, Shin-chan."

"I'm plotting my next step of my great revenge for everything Naruto has done to me and everyone else." Shinnosuke answered with a serious face._"Naruto wants to have all the fun of his mission for himself."_ Then his face lighened up. "What about you?"

Mizuki's eyebrow twitched. _"__Aaargh, this kid is so irritating.__"_ He tried to come up with something else but his mind drew blank. "Same here." He said reluctantly.

"What's your plan?"

"As if I would tell you."

"You know I would have left if you had just told me your lame plan."

"It's not lame!" Mizuki shouted. "I'm going to spread the word that Naruto stole the forbidden scroll and then I -"

"Told you. Lame." Mizuki's eyebrow twitched. "But I'll help you."

Mizuki tried to stop him but he vanished with a Substitution. Next, he noticed a horrible stench that made him nauseous. He held his nose and looked down. _"__He substituted with a pile of shit?!__"_

Mizuki tried to find Shin with no luck. "Now, he is going to tell everyone that Naruto stole the scroll ...wait, I was planning to do that anyway. With two persons, this piece of information is going to spread twice as fast."

Wow, he is good at calculating. Unfortunately, this is Shin-chan we are talking about. So it's going to be different …

* * *

"Mizuki planned to tell people that Naruto stole the forbidden scroll."

First ninja. "Naruto stole the forbidden scroll?! I must tell the hokage and the others!"

* * *

"Mizuki planned to purple that Naruto stoned forbidden scrolls."

Second ninja. "What the hell?! Naruto stoned forbidden scrolls? He is destroying valuable information. But what about Mizuki and purple."

* * *

"Mizuki planned to forbid Naruto from stroking purple scrolls."

Third ninja. "Stroking purple scrolls? What could that mean?" Then, realization hit the ninja. "Ahh, Naruto strokes his dick … no, no others too … and Mizuki knew a bout it but he wants to forbid others ..."

Thud.

* * *

"Mizuki plants forged purple scrolls and strokes Naruto."

Fouth ninja. Gasp. "That's why he never dated me. He makes his own own penises for … for … and poor Naruto. I need to tell the hokage."

* * *

A few hours later …

"I haven't done anythiing to Naruto. I hate Naruto. I hate him! I hate him! I hate him!"

"He must have forced Naruto into his sick sexual pleasures."

"In the end, he got jealous of other people and wanted him just for himself. In his twisted way, he loves Naruto."

Snap. Enough was enough. Mizuki wanted to endure the false accusations but, no, he couldn't take it any longer and spilled his great plan and Shinnosuke's meddling with it.

* * *

Later at the apartment of the Noharas …

Someone rang the bell. Shinnosuke was told to see who the visitor was and opened the door.

"Who are you?"

"My name is Ibiki Morino, head of the Torture and Interrogation department. I've heard of what you did to Mizuki, quite impressive I must say. Would you like to join as an interrogator?"

"Hmm. Are there any hot babes there?"

"Some, but they are excentric and have special tastes."

"Kinky. Okay, Shinnosuke Nohara is going to be an interrogator!"

In all prison cells, prisoners ceased whatever they were doing as they felt something terrible run down their spine. One prisoner voiced what all of them thought. "Something horrible just happened."


	2. You watch this cheap remake? - So?

Legendary Ninja Shin-chan 1: Shake in laughter before him

Chapter 2: You watch this cheap remake? - So?

* * *

#"..."# = speech from TV

* * *

Naruto was in a bad mood when he returned to his home. First, he was told that he had to retake his awesome photo and now this Konohamaru brat he punched before followed him. Finally, he had enough and spun around quickly. He pointed at the boy behind the horizontally held blanket with a wooden fence pattern.

"Stop following me! What the hell is that?! You aren't fooling anyone, idiot!"

"Why are yelling, Naruto? Cool, this part of town's got horizontal fences." Naruto sweatdropped at Shinnosuke. "And the fence sweatdrops, too."

Konohamaru gave up his pathetic disguise.

"It's a boy. I guess the red light district stays my favorite."

Konohamaru was prepared to make a grand speech on how impressive Naruto was but Shin's act took the wind out of his sails completely. He took a deep breath and faced Naruto. "Hey, I'll let you be my boss! In exchange … teach me that 'Sexy no Jutsu' you defeated Grandpa with! Please! Please, boss!"

"Huh? Boss ..?"

"And I'm your Super Boss, fence boy!"

"My name is Konohamaru, the Hokage's grandson, and you couldn't even look past my disguise!"

"You may have won this arrangement for now but don't think you have won, Konohamaru, the Hokage's grandson!"

Konohamaru developed a tick mark on his forehead. "Can we ditch him, boss? Please!"

* * *

Shinnosuke was walking on the street. He watched the training for a few minutes but he couldn't stand to see more malformed women. Sure, seeing Naruto getting worked up over it was a nice show. However, after a while it got boring so he left.

He looked up and spotted a man in dark blue clothes with a pair of dark, round glasses and a Leaf headband who was looking for something.

"You should look more down if you want to stare directly at cleavages!"

Every person's head snapped towards Ebisu who sputtered. "A gentleman such as I would never indulge in acts of perversion! I'm merely searching for my student." Then, he leaped towards the roof of the house opposite of him.

"You mean the fence boy with this weird hat or so and hair stinking only on the top of his head."

Ebisu misplaced his last step and fell face first on the roof. Quickly, he got up and looked at Shinnosuke. "You have seen the Hokage's grandson?"

Shinnosuke pointed and giggled at him. "You look like a huge perv with the blood running outta your nose."

Ebisu wiped off some blood with a handkerchief. "It is very rude to point at people and you should apologize for your false accusation. Also, could you answer my question?"

"Jeez, you are no fun at all. Yeah, I have seen him with Naruto. I can lead you to him."

_"__I need find young master quickly before the nine tails punk can corrupt his mind.__"_ "Thank you, I appreciate your help." Ebisu jumped down. "Lead the way."

Shinnosuke and Ebisu walked.

"So you think his hairdo stinks too?"

Ebisu suppressed a twitch of his eye and tried to ignore this and many more attempts of starting a conversation.

* * *

Ten minutes later...

Ebisu could see a ramen stand ahead. _"__I have heard that the brat loves ramen. He must have taken young master here.__"_ He sprinted towards the stand. "Young master!"

The only people he found though were an older looking man and a girl behind the counter. "How can we help you?"

"Have the Hokage's grandson and the fo-, I mean Naruto Uzumaki been here?"

"Not today, sir. Oh, hi Shin-chan!"

"Hey Ayame, Teuchi. Some beef ramen." Shinnosuke sat down on a stool.

"They are not here."

"I know."

"Then why did you lead me to this stand?"

"I'm hungry of course, why else?"

"You volunteered to lead me to the young master."

"Are you telling me to quit?"

"No, however it's important that I find them as soon as possible."

While Shinnosuke ate his ramen, Ebisu was watching him.

"Want so- (swallow) -me, too?"

"No, thanks."

* * *

A few minutes later...

"Ah, done!" Shinnosuke grabbed into his pant pockets. Then, he rummaged about his other pockets. "He is paying for me." He pointed with his thumb at Ebisu.

"What!? I won't! You pay for your own meals!"

"You make such a big fuss over it. If you just paid, we wouldn't need to argue."

"I could say the same thing about you."

Teuchi injected. "Don't worry. You can pay next time, Shin-chan."

"Aww."

Ebisu narrowed his eyes. _"__This child wanted to trick me.__"_ "I think I should search on my own. It will bear better results."

Shinnosuke gasped. "You are pregnant?! Congratulations! Is it a boy or a girl?"

Everyone in the stand facefaulted.

"Do I look like a woman to you?!"

"Really convincing crossdresser?"

After taking a deep breath, Ebisu looked down on his watch. "I see this was a complete waste of time. It's already 4:10 pm."

"WHAT! We need run fast before it starts." Shinnosuke ran out.

_"__What could he mean by before it starts?__"_ Intrigued, Ebisu caught up to Shinnosuke with ease.

As Shinnosuke ran up some stairs of a rundown apartment complex, he pulled out a key and opened the apartment door. Ebisu followed him to the living room.

Shinnosuke sat down in front of the TV and switched it on.

#"The adventures of Breadman and Raisin..."#

"Puh, not a second too late."

Behind Shinnosuke, Ebisu clenched his fists. "Youuu..."

"You are still there?"

"Yes."

Shinnosuke thought of what Ebisu would want from him. "Thanks for reminding me of one of my favorite TV shows. Be quiet for the rest of the show, 'kay?"

_"How dare this spoiled brat-"_

"I'm home!"

"That was the fox brat. I hear a second set of footsteps. Is young master still with him?" He left the living room. "I have found you. Now, young master, let's go home."

"No! I'm going to defeat granpa and get the Hokage name! Right now! don't get in my way!"

"A Hokage must be well versed in all aspects of being a ninja. You must know over a thousand skills and then finally … huh?"

"Transformation!" Instead of Konohamaru, a curvy blonde stood there. The nipples were only hidden by wisps of smoke and the crotch was only not seen because of the right leg. "Take this! Sexy no Jutsu!"

Ebisu's jaw dropped.

"Huh? Didn't work?" Konohamaru detransformed.

"W.. Wh.. What a vulgar skill!" Ebisu screamed. "I'm a gentleman, such a super low-class skill will never work against me!"

His tirade was cut by an angelic voice behind him. "Please don't be angry at him."

"Excuse me..." All thoughts fled his brain as he turned around. His mouth went dry as a desert since all the fluid was needed to keep him from falling over. The only word that could describe her was ... divine. Her long, chestnut-brown hair and her soothing, brown eyes were already breathtaking. Her blue markings, her innocent, bright smile and her white, lacy dress that could only be made of best fabrics this world had to offer made her look so otherworldly, so pure.

She made a few steps forward, not taking her eyes off him. With each step, her hips swayed to the side hypnotizing him. Trying to wrench his eyes from her hurt her so much from her disappointed look that he didn't dare trying again.

"I'm Belldandy, goddess of the present, first class unlimited."

A goddess? Yes, this was the only thing she could possibly be. When she took his hands, her skin felt so smooth. Blood rushed into his head.

"The reason I'm here is that you deserve a truly divine reward, Ebisu-san."

She put his hands on her breast. No air could make it through his throat anymore. Blood traveled at impossible speeds through his body, most prominently his face and a region further south. His knees became weak and he fell onto the floor.

She knelt down, her body over his, her face close to his, her eyes gazing lovingly into his.

She whispers. "I'm all yours."

WHOOSH!

Two torrents of blood shot out of Ebisu's nose, sending him through the closed door and flying away like a rocket.

"Ooh my, what a strong stream. How is it going to be when he releases into me?" She giggles at that.

Naruto caught the reference (lots of time with Shin sure does educate) and fainted.

"BOSS!" That was when he heard giggling, male giggling. He went to the living room.

Shinnosuke sat there with a bag of potato chips, apparently enjoying 'Breadman and Raisin'.

#"You will never defeat me, The Whittler. My plan to separate all raisins from bread may have failed but I will try again."#

#"There will always be people who love raisin bread and will fight for it like me and Raisin."#

#"If you are allergic to raisins, you should buy normal bread and not make everyone suffer because of your selfishness."#

#"Well said, Raisin."#

Konohamaru sweatdropped. "You watch this cheap remake?"

"So?"

"Shin!" Next, Shinnosuke was punched in the head by Naruto. "How could you ruin another anime?"

"It's a secret talent."

"KNUCKLE GRINDER FROM HELL!"

"You stole that move from mom-aaaahhhhhh!" The knuckles against his head soon became too much.

"Nope, she taught me."

FATALITY!

FINISH HIM!

Naruto wasn't sure where the words came from but he continued by turning Shin around who had a glazed look in his eyes. "HEADBUTT!"

Konohamaru checked Shinnosuke quickly. "He's out cold."

Winner: Naruto Nohara

Suddenly, they felt a great sense of doom wash over them. "What happened to the door?!"

"Crap! It's mom! Every man for himself! Substitution!"

"Boss! Boss!"

"Explain."

Konohamaru gulped.

* * *

released on: 03-13-13 (chapter + omake 1)

* * *

Okay 20 views wasn't what I was expecting when I released the first chapter, more like 50-100.

I hope someone will make an omake about 'Breadman and Raisin' because I can't. I have neither read the Batman comics nor watched it on TV and somehow didn't watch the films either (at least not completely).

* * *

Omake 1

"Ooh my, what a strong stream. How is it going to be when he releases into me?" 'Belldandy' giggles.

Naruto caught the reference and fainted.

"BOSS!" That was when Konohamaru heard giggling, male giggling. He went to the living room.

Shinnosuke sat there with a bag of potato chips, apparently enjoying 'Breadman and Raisin'.

"Was that your Sexy no Jutsu?"

"Huh?" Shinnosuke put a few chips in his mouth. "Nope, that was foreplay."

"Is that a jutsu?"

Shinnosuke turned around and shot him a look that said 'Are you that dumb?'. "You have no Fucking idea what I'm talking about."

Konohamaru shrunk back.

Shinnosuke turned back and stroked chin and his imaginary beard. "Ah, kids these days. What shall ever become of the next generation?" He shook his head and sighed.

"Hey, you are only twelve yourself!"


	3. That smells like

Legendary Ninja Shin-chan 1: Shake in laughter before him

Chapter 3: That smells like …

* * *

Naruto was standing on his head on the Hokage mountain. He was the Godaime Hokage and had just saved Konohagakure from the greatest threat humanity ever faced, even surpassing the danger of the Kyuubi.

"I have always believed you could do it, Naruto." The Sandaime Hokage joined him on his right side.

On the left side, Hinata came, too. "I think we should celebrate this." She kissed him fully on his lips. "And you deserve a great reward, too."

Naruto grinned. "What is it going to be?" Then noticed a horrible stench. _"__That smells like dad's socks.__"_

Suddenly, Hinata and Sarutobi pinned him on the ground. Sarutobi pulled out a pair of socks.

"Hey! Hey! What's the big idea?!"

The former Hokage simply shoved the pair of socks under his nose.

Naruto tried to free himself and get the socks off his face. However, their grips were firm and the socks were held down on his face.

When they let go of Naruto, his upper body snapped forward and the socks flew away.

* * *

Naruto ran his hands over his face to make sure that nothing of the socks remained on his face.

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Himawari and Shinnosuke were both rolling on the floor, laughing.

"YOU!"

Hiro Nohara complained drowsily as he entered the room. "Do you have to be so loud every morning?"

Naruto jumped at Himawari and Shinnosuke to punish them.

* * *

Later...

After breakfast, Naruto, Shinnosuke and Himawari left their apartment and went to the ninja academy. On their way, they met two boys. One of them had a hair style that made his head look like a rice ball. The other boy was taller than the other kids and always had a running nose.

Naruto ran towards them. "Hi, Masao! Hi, Bo!" He stopped in front of them and pointed at his forehead. "Check this out! I passed!"

"How?" Masao asked. "I don't want to sound mean but your clone was really bad."

"Congratulation, Naruto." Bo just said.

"I took another test by Mizuki, a fake one, but I beat him up with my new technique. I was so awesome that Iruka-sensei and the old man had to let me pass." Naruto told them excitedly.

"Yeah, the headband is not even his."

Naruto spun around and pointed at Shinnosuke. "Don't make it sound like I stole it, Shin! Iruka-Sensei gave it to me!"

"Where is your headband, Shi-? Uh!"

The headband dangled in front of Shinnosuke, one end tugged in his underpants.

"I know it's big and shiny but it's not like you've seen it for the first time."

Everyone but Shinnosuke looked away red-faced as Shinnosuke pulled up his pants.

As they were walking towards the ninja academy, Naruto continued re-telling how he graduated leaving out the Kyuubi and only mentioning Shinnosuke. Sure feels nice to have something to brag about.

Eventually, a new topic was discussed. "I wonder in which teams you are going to be."

"I hope I will get two strong guys who will protect me."

_"Of course, Masao had to say something like that."_

"I want Sakura-chan on my team. ...and the third one..." After a while, Naruto shrugged. "Anyone but Sasuke."

"Hinata-chan is a must have. Nice figure, her boobs will become a nice pair-" Shinnosuke fingered imaginary breasts. The other ones backed away from as he did that. "- and I really like her. She's a cute girl now, but in the future …" He giggled, lost in his own perversion. His face scrunched up when he tried to think of a third member. "Ah! I got an idea! Why don't you become a kunoichi, Naruto?!"

PUNCH!

"No Way!"

"Aww, what about your team, Bo?"

"I hope we will get along with each other and our jonin sensei."

"I'm so jealous of you! You are going on cool and dangerous missions while I must learn here." Himawari pouted.

"Yeah, we will get in lots of flights with other people. We are going to travel a lot and learn cool jutsus." _"__So that I can invent new pick-up lines.__"_

"Many adventures lie ahead of us. I'm so excited."

Shinnosuke put his face close to Masao's. "But it's also dangerous. One mistake and..."

"AHHH!"

"AAHHHHHH! No, I don't wanna be a ninja! Mommy!"

"Masao, you are such a shrimp."

"It's wimp but Shin is right. Don't worry too much, we are going to be great ninjas."

"You need to grow a pair of balls and some muscles, Masao, like …" Himawari's eyes locked on a passing man and got a strange glint. "... a man." She giggled the same way as Shinnosuke. "Excuse me."

_"They are so much alike."_

* * *

When Himawari and the others had arrived at the ninja academy, they had parted. At the moment, Shinnosuke, Naruto, Masao and Bo were sitting by Hinata.

Naruto sighed deeply. "I hope Sakura-chan comes soon." He turned his head to the classroom door.

Next to him, Hinata hung her head depressingly.

Shinnosuke whispered to her. "Don't worry. I'll be by your side. Naruto may be stupid, clumsy, short, unattractive, tick-headed,-"

"I'VE HEARD THAT!" Naruto shouted with a tick mark on his forehead.

"Hey, it's Sakura and Ino!"

Naruto's head snapped to the classroom door.

"Phew. Danger passed." Shinnosuke stretched his arms and put his left arm around Hinata's shoulders who blushed upon contact.

"SAKURA-CHAN! Will you go on a date with me?"

PUNCH!

"Naruto-kun!"/"That must've hurt."

"You are annoying, Naruto! I will only love Sasuke!"

"I'll ask you again because I love you."

"Ah, he truly is on a good way to becoming a real Nohara man."

"Erm, what do you mean by that, Shin-chan?"

"Dad always complains that Mitzi has got the pants on in the relationship but I think he got used to it and he likes it secretly. I don't mind a little pain every once in a while in my imagination and Naruto gets beaten up daily by Sakura and he still loves her."

"Oh my!" Hinata gasped while blushing fiercely.

"I think you need to toughen up a little, Hinata-chan."

"T-T-Toughen u-up!?"

"You know …" A small whip motion. "TSCH!"

THUMP!

"Hey, what's going on over there?" Masao pointed towards Naruto who was surrounded by Sasuke's fangirls.

Shinnosuke whistled. "They are glowing."

"Narutooo." Sakura growled lowly. "YOU ARE ANNOYING!"

What followed was a beating from more than half of the girls of the class. Occasionally, Naruto's screams escaped from the crowd of angry shouts.

"Naruto must really enjoy himself with the girls."

Masao shot him a weird look. "I don't think so. I was beaten up by a bunch of guys a few times and it was never pleasant."

"Maybe they touched you in the wrong places."

* * *

A few minutes later

"So what was it like, Naruto?"

Naruto gave Shinnosuke a half-lidded stare. "You need to ask?"

"Yes." Shinnosuke answered seriously.

"Painful and humiliating. Still I'm not going to give up."

Shinnosuke thought to himself. "If he continues like that, he will start to like her because of the pain and dehumanization. Or maybe he is in the dential stage."

Naruto shivered. _"__No, I'm nothing like that. I love her.__" "__Gotta change the topic.__"_ "Shin, Iruka-sensei is announcing the teams now."

"... You will be split into three man teams. We tried to balance each team's strength."

As Iruka reached team seven, he shivered. _"__This team is going to be a nightmare.__"_ He gulped. "Team seven. Sasuke Uchiha, Naruto Uzumaki ... and Shinnosuke Nohara. Your jonin-sensei will Kakashi Hatake."

"Iruka-sensei! Why does an outstanding ninja like have to be on the same team as that bum?!" Naruto pointed at Sasuke.

"Iruka-sensei! Why do I have to placed on a team with no girls!?" Shinnosuke glared at Iruka.

Sasuke buried his face in his hands. _"__Why do I have to be on a team with two clowns?__"_

Iruka answered the question in the order they were asked. "Sasuke was the first among the 30 graduates while you were the dead last." _"__That doesn't explain Shin-chan though.__"_ "Shinnosuke, many charges of sexual harassment have been filed against you." _"__And some against your sister already.__"_ "So as preventive measure, you are placed into an all boys team." _"__At least, this is the most logical explanation.__"_

Shinnosuke slumped in his seat. "I have never thought something like that could happen." He whined. The rest of the class sweatdropped at that.

Before he continued with the next team, Iruka sent a pitying look at Sasuke. Shinnosuke and Naruto were the reason of most teacher's early retirement and also his first gray hairs. To be placed on a team with both of them, he shivered. _"__Good luck, Sasuke. Kakashi, too. __At least, he won't have to worry about his hair turning gray. __Maybe they will fall out.__"_

The rest of the teams were announced, too.

Team 8: Kiba Inuzuka, Shino Aburame, Hinata Hyuga; Sensei: Kurenai Yuhi

Team 9: Sakura Haruno, Masao Sato, Bo; Sensei: (unreadable)

Team 10: Ino Yamanaka, Shikamaru Nara, Choji Akimichi; Sensei: Asuma Sarutobi

* * *

Omake 1: How to select genin teams (and other stuff) – Take 2 (first version sucked)

* * *

"UNLUCKY CHANNEL!"

A sign saying 'Legendary Ninja Shin-chan: Shake in laughter before him: Episode 3: This smells like... – Omake 1: How to select genin teams (and other stuff) – UNLUCKY CHANNEL' was lifted up. It revealed a guy holding a microphone and only wearing boxers with hearts on it.

"Hi, unluckies! This is the first ever (and possibly last ever) parody of 'Lucky Channel' in this story! Present jonin and audience, my name is Lord Keiichi and so on. Tonight we are going to arrange the genin teams. Because you extra jonin cost so much, I'll have to do everything on my own!"

One of the jonin of the crowd of extra jonin that was pointed at replied. "Buy some clothes first."

"Is this normal?" Kurenai whispered to Asuma.

"Well, the cameras are new."

Kurenai sweatdropped.

"Our featured characters in this show are Asuma Sarutobi," A spotlight went on. "Kurenai Yuhi," Another spotlight went on. "Kakashi Hatake"

* * *

At the memorial stone, a confused Kakashi stood in a column of light trying to figure out what was going on and how to leave this annoying light that kept following him.

* * *

"… and an uninteresting filler character who we need for the whole story." A spotlight lit up but soon the light began to flicker and a few seconds later, the light went completely out. "Oh well, you saw him."

"Let's continue. Each of is going to pull three slips of paper out of this box." A skull, crossed bones and the sentence 'Children can kill, too.' were sprayed on it. "And Kakashi gets the leftovers."

* * *

"Oh, what a surprise, it's the same result as mentioned earlier in this episode."

"You have rigged this, haven't you?" Someone asked though it more of a statement.

"Hehe, of course, I haven't. And the one-on-one matches in the chunin exams are decided by chance, too."

Everyone in the room sweatdropped.

"Let's take a look at Team Kakashi."

Although everyone knew who was on his team by now, there was still collective silence when last slips of paper were opened. With Sasuke's skill and later sharingan, Naruto's stamina and insane amount of clones and Shinnosuke's randomness that drove people nuts regularly, this was going to be... (wait for it) … a legendary team.

"You know. If they don't kill each other, they could become a team on par or even surpassing the sannin."

"But who is going to be Tsunade."

Collective shiver. A few seconds later, the speaker was thrown out of the window.

Then music was played.

"Oh, we have already reached the end of this episode. I hope you have enjoyed it and that you will leave many review. Bye unluckies and tune in for the next episode!"

The same sign as before fell down this time.

"Puh. Done. I can't believe all the words fit onto this sign. All characters can leave now. Turn off the spotlights and-"

"Hey! Wait!" Naruto's voice could be heard. "You can't just finish this episode without showing my scene with Sakura-chan."

"It's not like anything changed from the manga script. Also, you will have more scenes with Sakura."

"Okay." A few seconds later, Naruto remembered something. "Wait a minute, then why are we on different teams now?"

"Uhm. Nobody has the intention to build a wall between you and Sakura."

"What's that supp-" In that instant, the microphones were turned off.


End file.
